Stupid Football Arguments: The Best College Team vs. the Worst NFL Team

Editor’s note: Every football season, it seems like certain arguments/discussions happen every single year between football fans. Some of those arguments are stupid and should never, ever happen again. This series will look some of the worst.

Every time an NFL team has a terrible start to the season, you hear the same thing: “Man, [crappy NFL team sucks]. I bet the best college team could beat them.”

This year was no exception. The wost NFL team in 2011 – the Indianapolis Colts – sucked. No question about it. The vast majority of their games were not even all that competitive. The Colts were bad on defense (25th in the NFL) and worse on offense (30th in the NFL). Quarterbacks Curtis Painter and Dan Orlovsky were both pretty awful…and there weren’t many other bright spots to make up for their struggles.

This year’s college season featured two exceptional teams: LSU and eventual national champion Alabama. The Crimson Tide had a truly special team, no question. Alabama was led by an incredible defense that only gave up a ridiculously low 8.2 points a game in 2011. The offense wasn’t shabby either, scoring 34.8 points per contest. There was unbelievable talent all the way across the roster, as evidenced by the eight players Alabama players selected in the NFL draft this spring (including four in the first round).

Looking at that, you might think: “I bet Alabama could have beat the Colts! That defense was unbelivable! The Colts wouldn’t be able to score!” And lots of fans apparently made just that argument.

I’ll say this just once…

STOP! Just stop! Not only could Alabama NOT have beaten the Colts, the Colts would win by 50+ points. Easily. The Colts would have been stronger at every single position except running back (Trent Richardson is awesome). NFL players – even ones on crappy teams – are MEN. Rugged, brutal, insanely athletic and strong MEN. Even amazingly talented college players like Alabama’s are just not on a similar maturity level.

And that’s to say nothing of depth. Alabama has MAYBE 20-25 future pros. Maybe. The Colts? 53 pros? Everyone is good. SEC fans like to talk about how “fast” the SEC is. You know what’s 10 times faster? The NFL? Half the Alabama players would be totally out of their depth athletically.

Remember how I mentioned how bad Curtis Painter and Dan Orlovsky were at QB for the Colts this year? Well, both of them were really good college QBs! They would CARVE UP the “great” Alabama defense. Of course, it would help that they would have all day to throw. The Colts’ offensive line would just dominate their college opponents. And give Reggie Wayne and Pierre Garcon all day to get open against college cornerbacks? Dear lord.

And that’d be the more competitve side of the ball! The Colts’ defense would DESTROY the slightly above-average college offense of Alabama. Trent Richardson is awesome…but he’d be getting hit in the backfield every play. And the Crimson Tide passing game? Non-existent. Assuming they could get a pass off (Dwight Freeney and Robert Mathis would have a field day hitting the quarterback), they wouldn’t complete any.

To make things worse, it’s not like great coaching or anything could save the Crimson Tide. Nick Saban couldn’t win in the NFL with NFL PLAYERS!

Anyway, let’s never, ever make this argument again. The worst NFL team would absolutely, positively destroy the college champion. 100 times out of 100. Period. The end.